AT LAST! BOLIVIA NOW HAS ACCESS TO THE SEA, AND IT’S ALL THANKS TO CHILE (TRANSLATION)

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Bolivia lost its access to the Pacific Ocean during the War of the Pacific towards the end of the 19th century.  Now, in the wake of Chile’s victory over Argentina in the final of the Copa America comes this satirical article by Roy Bobadilla.  Read the original in Spanish at the site eldeforma.com.

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Bolivia obtains its long-awaited access to sea on the most unexpected side

Bolivian fisherman will finally be able to work.  Bolivia awoke today to an idyllic beach on its southern border.

However, there is an explanation for the miracle.

After the defeat at the hands (and feet) of Chile in the final of the Copa America and before the act of being converted into the Cruz Azul (Mexican football club) of the world, tears of citizens flooded the territory known up until yesterday as Argentina to create a new sea known as the Sea of Tears in recognition of its creators.

With the newly created Sea of Tears, Bolivia now has the sea access it has so desired ever since it lost it.

Wearing a swimming suit and a snorkel, President Evo Morales announced that he was happy that his country finally has sea access although he admitted that he no longer remembered why he had wanted it.

“I’m going swimming”, he declared with a piña colada in his hand.

And so the maritime conflict reaches its end and in its place Bolivia will initiate a long legal process to reclaim sovereignty of the Falkland Islands because, it is claimed, they are situated within its waters.  Bolivia also wants a portion of Antarctica as well as a penguin pet.

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